


Cartanica

by AtropaAzraelle (Polyoxyethylene)



Series: Of Walls and Nerds [15]
Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Angst, M/M, Pain, Scars, YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS, it's chapter ten guys, very brief Noctis, very brief Prompto
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-17
Updated: 2017-03-17
Packaged: 2018-10-06 19:14:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10342782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Polyoxyethylene/pseuds/AtropaAzraelle
Summary: "I would stay with you all." That was fine as a sentiment, but Gladio has a duty, and now Ignis is putting them all in danger.





	

**Author's Note:**

> BUMPY RIDE GETTING THIS ONE POSTED THERE.
> 
> One day I will get back to blatant porn instead of this angsty character exploration, but today is so not that day. As always, comments and kudos are much appreciated, and thank you from the bottom of my heart to everyone that has left feedback on my previous work.

“Might I have a word with you, Gladio?”

Ignis stood, the picture of dignity. Blindness hadn't stopped him looking presentable even if it required Prompto's cheerfully helpful, “Missed a spot!” when he shaved in the morning.

Gladio looked at him, temper still frayed from the words Ignis had with all of them earlier. They'd beaten the Malboro, and wouldn't have been able to without Ignis's help; he'd worked out what it was, and he'd known how to beat it, and he'd done it, he'd saved them. His intellect had got them through that damned mine, and then it had saved their lives, and he seemed to think that was enough. He was staying with them. Prompto and Noct were in agreement. It was Ignis's choice, if he thought he could keep up, let him.

Gladio disagreed. Watching Ignis stumble around Cartanica had hurt. Watching him fall over on the soggy, uneven ground, and flail around pathetically whenever they had to clear their path of monsters hurt. Ignis had always been poise and precision, and Gladio could see him working to maintain it now, but as soon as they were in danger it had all fallen apart.

Then there was Noctis. Ignis had given his sight for that ring. The Oracle had given her life, and Noctis kept it in his pocket instead of on his finger where it rightfully belonged. Ignis had called his sight a small sacrifice, had drawn comfort from the fact they'd succeeded despite the cost, and then Noctis walked around with the weight of his duty sat in his pocket where it could be more easily ignored.

_And Ignis let him._ Give him time, he'd said. Noctis would fulfil his destiny _when he was ready_. That annoyed Gladio more than anything else. Ignis mothered Noct, Ignis enabled Noct's feckless, carefree approach to the world, and he always had. Even now, blind, unable to shave himself without Prompto's help in the morning, he still enabled it.

“Problem?” Noct asked, looking from Ignis to Gladio.

“Nothing warranting royal attention,” Ignis replied. “Gladio?”

Gladio grumbled, wordless, but it was at least a noise, and Ignis would be able to hear it.

“We'll be over here then,” Prompto said, starting slow and then racing for the end of his sentence as he grabbed at Noct's arm and tugged him away. He pulled him towards the far end of the platform, glancing over his shoulder twice along the way, while Noctis protested and was pulled along like a balloon on a string.

Ignis waited until the sound of their hurried and heavy footsteps had died away, and then he waited a minute longer. Gladio didn't look at him. When Ignis had waited long enough, he said, “Say it.”

“Say what?” Gladio asked, his tone more confrontational than he'd intended.

“That this is a mistake. That I'm a danger to you, and Noctis, that I should go back to Caem and sit safely with Iris while you press on to Gralea.” Ignis wore that placid, reasonable look Gladio was used to, but he was looking somewhere just to Gladio's right. “I don't need to see your face to know what you're thinking, Gladio.”

Gladio scowled at him. He wanted to grab the man and shake him about as much as he wanted to hold him, and those two urges didn't feel like they were in conflict right now. “Fine,” he said, gruffly, “I want you to go back to Caem.”

“No,” Ignis replied.

The urge to shake Ignis was starting to win out over the urge to hold him. “What?” Gladio asked. He was too tired and too battered by the last few weeks for whatever game Ignis was playing with him now.

“No, I will not go back.”

Gladio growled, his temper flaring again. “Yeah,” he said, shortly, “I'd figured that.”

“Then what is the problem?” Ignis asked, so damn reasonably that he might be asking a child why they didn't like their carrots.

Gladio threw his arms in the air and paced, growling with a frustration it was hard to put words to. Ignis didn't move, just stood, hands folded over the stick he needed to get around even halfway safely now. “We can't keep you safe!” he snapped, eventually. It hurt to say almost as much as it was going to hurt to hear, but it needed to be said, and it needed to be heard. “You're a liability out there with us, and I can't keep my eye on you _and_ Noct.”

“So don't,” Ignis answered, like it was so dreadfully simple. He said it like he expected a lightbulb to go on in Gladio's brain, and for him to perk up as if he just hadn't thought of that. Yeah, it would say, he could just not, he could just not care, he could just leave one of them to get eaten by monsters, that was an option, sure.

“It's not that simple,” Gladio spat back.

“It is.”

“It's not! Ignis,” Gladio said the man's name, and his tone took a turn for pleading. He paced again, back, and forth once more as he gathered his argument. Ignis waited for him, responding to the sound of his pacing, or the shift in the air as he moved past him, or the desperate tone of his voice, Gladio wasn't sure, but he appreciated that he was being allowed the time to gather his thoughts, however infuriating it was that he was being _allowed_.

“I can't do it,” he said, finally. “I can't watch you get hurt while I protect Noct. That mine _fucking sucked_ , Ignis, if you could see yourself,” he trailed off again. There was a bench nearby and Gladio stopped his pacing and sat down on it heavily.

“The fact that I can't is rather the problem,” Ignis pointed out, turning slightly so that he was facing Gladio. “You have a duty, Gladio,” he said, his voice a little softer, but his tone was no less firm. “We both agreed that our relationship would not get in the way of that.”

Gladio rested his wrists on his knees and hung his head. He hated this conversation, but he was glad he wasn't having to do this in front of Noct, and Prompto. This was private, however much it affected all of them. The emotions involved were private. “Then as part of my duty, Iggy,” he said, “you need to go. You're putting us all in danger by staying.”

Ignis was silent for a little while, allowing those words to hang in the air between them. Eventually, his voice quiet and gentle, he asked, “Might I sit down?”

Gladio looked up at him, and then murmured, shuffling over on the bench. “Yeah,” he said, reaching his hand out to Ignis to capture his hand as he took a step forwards. “Here,” he said, guiding him to where he could sit.

“Thank you,” Ignis replied, resting his stick against the bench and crossing one leg over the other. He clasped his hands together on his knees, and if it wasn't for the dark glasses, from this side of him, Gladio could almost convince himself nothing was wrong. 

“I know it's selfish and stupid of me to stay,” Ignis said, into the heavy air. “I just don't know what else to do.” Gladio looked at him, a deep frown on his face and a painful ache in his chest at hearing those words from Ignis. Ignis who always knew what to do, who always had a strategy. “I have never known how to be anywhere but by Noct's side,” Ignis continued. “I have never known any life but service to him.” He turned his head slightly, so that he was looking towards Gladio, and Gladio could see the scars on the left side of his face. “I was six when I was given responsibility for him, Gladio, and the only time that he's been out of my care was when he nearly died. I struggle to let him go now,” Ignis admitted, “you know that.”

Gladio did know that. They argued about that. Other couples argued about money, and Ignis and Gladio argued about Noctis. It was just how things were. “Yeah,” he said, as gently as he could manage, “but now you're the one putting him in danger.”

“I'm trusting you to protect him,” Ignis replied, softly.

“I can do that with you in Caem,” Gladio pointed out.

Ignis sighed, and it sounded so weary, and so worn. He pushed his glasses up his nose, and Gladio turned his attention to the floor between his feet once more. “If I go back now,” Ignis said, “then I'm done. I'm of no use to Noct, and I lose everything.”

Gladio scowled at the floor. “You won't,” he said.

“I will,” Ignis replied, simply. “I'll lose the only role I've ever known. If I can't stay with him now, how can I return to serve him? He'll move beyond me. You all will.”

Gladio looked at Ignis, and lifted his hand, placing it slowly over Ignis's clasped hands and squeezing. “I will never move beyond you,” he said.

“How long will it take?” Ignis asked. “How long to Gralea? How long to retrieve the crystal, to return it to Lucis, to seat Noct on the throne? Weeks?” he asked. “Months?”

Gladio squeezed Ignis's hand again, and then withdrew. “I don't know,” he admitted.

“Too long,” Ignis answered, “and you will change in that time, and so will I, and so will he. This journey changes us every day, in small ways, and if we hadn't taken it together,” he said, and then stopped. “Assuming you even succeed,” he added. “Three people infiltrating the heart of the empire and retrieving a crystal guaranteed to be under heavy guard is a tall order, and I would be sat in Caem while the night draws ever longer, never knowing that the only people I care about are lost and the world is doomed.”

“Noct is the Chosen King,” Gladio said, “we will do it, it's his destiny.”

“Then do it with me there,” Ignis said. “Protect _him_ , even if it means watching me get hurt. I don't want you to stop me from falling, Gladio,” he said, turning a little further, so the scars of his ravaged eye showed under his glasses, “but it would be nice if you would help me back to my feet afterwards.”

Gladio felt a barb laced with a guilt like poison in those words, and he felt its prick, and then its slow progress through his veins.

“Prompto has been doing a better job than you _or_ Noct, lately.”

“Sorry,” Gladio said, as the guilt reached his chest and began to curl up there, heavy and unpleasant.

“I'd mind less,” Ignis said, clearly moving from gentle explanation into outright telling Gladio off, “if you weren't using me as a weapon against Noct right now, while being just as insensitive.”

Gladio huffed unhappily. “He still hasn't put that damned ring on, Ignis,” he said, as if it was explanation, and excuse.

“He will, when it is time.”

“The world is running out of time,” Gladio said, his temper threatening to rise again.

“Do you remember,” Ignis asked, “when we were young and Noct was shirking his schoolwork, and avoiding facing up to his duty? You told me to have a little more faith in him. He came through then, Gladio, he will come through now.”

“You sound so sure,” Gladio grumbled, scowling at the reminder.

“That ring is a terrible burden,” Ignis said, turning to look ahead of himself and lifting his head, almost as if he could see the sky, or perhaps he could feel the warmth of the sun before it began to set again, so damned early these days. “Noctis watched it wear his father down. Now it has cost him Lady Lunafreya to obtain, and,” Ignis bowed his head again for a moment, “he must watch all I have lost, and may still lose. So many have sacrificed so much for him, Gladio, and there may be more sacrifices ahead of us. I don't believe he's ignoring it, I believe he bears the weight of it, and that is why he can't bring himself to wear the ring yet. He will, when it is time.”

Gladio sighed. “I hope you're right.”

“Give him time,” Ignis said, “and in giving him time, you will be allowing me similar.” He frowned, and added, softly, “I am trying to find my way around an unfamiliar world, in the darkness, and you and Noct and Prompto are the only tethers I have to the world I know. Don't leave me to try and do this alone.”

Gladio felt that guilt curling in his chest again, nipping at his throat and his stubborn pride. Ignis didn't admit vulnerability easily. He'd have never admitted to this if Noct and Prompto had been within earshot, if there was even the slightest risk they might have been. He placed his hand over Ignis's again, peeling one from atop the other so he could clasp his fingers and squeeze. “Fine,” he said. “I'll give you both time. Just promise me something?” Ignis turned his face towards him again, and even though he didn't speak, Gladio took it as permission to continue. “You won't make me watch you die? I nearly lost you once. I can't go through that again.”

Ignis took that in, and then nodded his head. “I'll try.”

Gladio frowned, feeling Ignis's fingers beneath his own. “I still want you to go back to Caem,” he admitted.

“I know,” Ignis replied, turning his hand slightly so he could grasp Gladio's in return, and squeeze it back. “Were the tables turned, so would I, but I need your support, not your protection, Gladio.”

Gladio bit his lip, twisting that idea around in his mind. He nodded, and then remembered that Ignis wouldn't see that gesture. “I'll try,” he said, mirroring Ignis's statement that he wasn't going to die.

“Then we can tell Prompto the coast is clear,” Ignis said.

Gladio grinned a little, looking over to where Prompto had dragged Noct. They'd gone around a corner, and he couldn't see them from his seated position, but he could imagine how they were acting. It had been easy enough to get time with Ignis on their journey, their shenanigans at the ball before they'd left had brought their relationship out into the open, and while they maintained some professionalism, it had always been easy to get rid of Prompto and Noct when they needed some time together.

Just hinting at wanting time together was usually enough to get Prompto to drag Noct out of a morning on some photography field trip, usually giving Gladio a good hour with Ignis. Hotels were better, when they stopped because they could and not because they had to. 

“Yeah,” Gladio said, a smile on his face for the first time in weeks at the memory of happier times that had only been brief weeks ago. “We've got a train to catch. Noct wants to stop in Tenebrae. I suppose we can let him.”

“Indeed,” Ignis agreed, “and, Gladio?”

“Yeah?” Gladio asked, turning to look at Ignis again.

“I'm perfectly recovered below the neck,” he said, “you can stop treating me like I'm made of glass.”

Gladio stopped, trying to find a response to that and unable to come up with one. What could he say? That it hadn't felt right? That it hurt him to look at Ignis's scars as much as it had hurt Ignis to bear them? That waking up in the middle of the night to see Ignis asleep usually had Gladio check his breathing because he'd come so close to losing him forever? His every urge since that day in Altissia had been to hold and protect Ignis, and that was what he'd done. “Sorry,” he said, “I just--”

“I needed it at first,” Ignis said, cutting him off. “I don't need it now.”

Gladio looked at him, and felt that uncomfortable guilt shift in his chest again. “That might take me a bit of time,” he admitted. He wasn't sure he was ready for that again, even if Ignis was.

“I can give you time,” Ignis replied, gently, but firmly, “just don't take too long about it or you won't be the only one growing short tempered.” He smiled, and he smiled the way he always used to smile; that slightly knowing, slightly teasing curve of his mouth that Gladio realised he'd desperately missed.

“Might need some actual privacy to fix that,” Gladio replied, and it was such a huge relief to be able to make that kind of a comment again. “You get a bit noisy for a train car.”

“Bloody well gag me if you must,” Ignis replied, but he squeezed Gladio's hand again, and flashed him a tender smile.

Gladio looked at him for a moment, taking in how much of Ignis was still the same despite his wounds, and the burden he bore. He released his hand from Ignis's and brought it up to his damaged cheek, stroking his thumb over scarred skin before he pressed forward to take a kiss. It didn't last long, and it didn't go deep, but it was confirmation that they were both still here, and with each other.

Gladio closed his eyes as he pulled away, and Ignis's hand rested over the back of his, holding it against his cheek so Gladio could feel the muscle shift with a smile under his hands.

“Thank you,” Ignis said.

Gladio looked at him, and that small, grateful smile on his face. “You're welcome,” he said.


End file.
